Today, today.

Today is the day of the party for my sister's birthday, which was Thursday. She's so old now!
I also might go to a friend's party tonight, but I am not so sure how I'll feel about that later.

I think I might start taking chlorophyll. I hear it's very good for the body, and since I do not eat a lot of green, leafy vegetables it might do me some good.

Something made my face break out really, really bad. I have been using this method to clear it up, and it works quite well. I have also been using salicylic acid products. This does make my skin feel dry, and it makes it a lot more sensitive to the sun, but this is what I always must do to clear my skin up. Because I get cystic acne, I find that I almost have to poison my skin to repair it. I have been trying to only put the medicated things on the problem areas, though, since my skin has been insanely sensitive of late.

I believe my skin has become more sensitive because I have been using a glycolic acid toner. I was using it every night and never in the mornings, but since my skin has become so sensitive I have switched to using it every other night. I have also been using my pineapple enzyme mask once a week instead of twice to limit my exfoliation and help my skin heal while still keeping it healthy.

The measures I have taken thus far to help my skin have been very effective. I also switched my night moisturizer (because I am pretty sure that's what broke me out) to CeraVe moisturizing cream instead of my Eucerin Sensitive Skin CoQ10 cream. The CeraVe feels much less heavy on my face, absorbs more quickly, and moisturizes just as well (if not better than) as the Eucerin. It's also quite a bit less expensive. I get a 16 oz. tub for fourteen dollars while the Eucerin was about ten dollars for a lot less than 16 ounces. So there!

In other news, Lola has grown to be a gigantic beast! She is still as precious as always, though. I love my precious puppeh!

I have been considerably less social of late than I would like. It seems that when I am in a social mood, others are busy. When others are in a social mood, I am not in a social mood. I am not entirely sure how to handle that. I just hate making myself go out when I don't feel like it. I always end up doing something I wish I hadn't.

I have been trying to watch the movie The Red Shoes for the past two days, and I simply cannot finish it. I have found it quite boring thus far.

I watched 2001: A Space Odyssey for the second time in my life a few weeks ago. It is as mind-numbing and awful as I remember it.

I also watched Poltergeist for the first time since I was a child, and I found it to be quite helpful because I will no longer have nightmares about it. It's not as scary to me now as it was when I was a child.

I watched Salò or 120 Days of Sodom last night. People say it is traumatizing and difficult to watch. It is supposed to be one of the most messed up movies ever made. I will not lie and say it's not really screwed up, but I did not find it especially difficult to watch. I will say I found a few scenes made me quite uncomfortable, and I'm not about to recommend anyone watch it.

I watched Dario Argento's Opera also. I love that movie. I love Dario Argento.

The Birthday

I dragged my lovey to the aquarium, and I discovered that they now have two, gorgeous baby Giant Pacific Octopodes! and the cadaver of a GIANT SQUID! I cannot begin to explain how fucking enthralled I was to see not only one of my favorite octopodes (TWO and babies at that, super cute) in such close proximity BUT a giant squid...it's been a dream, ok? A fucking dream. I wish so badly that I could SCUBA dive deep enough to see a live, giant squid, but I know it is impossible, so I am so fucking happy that I got to examine up-close and personal a real fucking giant squid cadaver. I was flipping my shit. And the octopodes were fucking spectacular, at least one was. The other was hiding itself very well. I just wanted to go hug them, but of course their water would be too cold for me. The one I could see was so beautiful and so cute and so little! It seemed very agitated and upset though. I don't think such an animal should be kept in an aquarium. It's not a safe place for them, and they get bored so easily, and it's just not a good idea. They need to be in the ocean where they have lots of space. They need limitless space, like all the animals, but octopodes are considerably more intelligent than fish, obviously. I do feel bad for the whale sharks and the belugas though. They could also use more space, really, as they are huge creatures and so beautiful. 

Standing there, observing that beautiful octopus I felt that marine biology might be a really good direction for me. I could, of course, specialize in cephalopods. Obviously such things could change, as they often do with me, but I felt so strongly. I just love those majestic, beautiful creatures so much. They are just so amazing and interesting and ---------. Words cannot describe my immense interest. 

Otherwise, birthday bash went off without a hitch! Boyfriend seemed to like his gift (?!?!), so that makes me happy, and I hope it made him super happy as well. I was so afraid he wouldn't be surprised or like it or be excited or something like that. Sometimes I wish that I could find a steady, good job that in which I could actually LAST for a long period of time (I have a track record of being fired...) just so I could buy him presents all the time. I could spend all of my time shopping for him. OK. I am getting mushy. I will stop. We ate delicious noms, of course. We went to the park and played! AND we found the most delightful book store, and there were kitties living in it. I love when I find book stores with kitties living in them. I bought two books: one about New Zealand's flowers and birds, and one with funny pictures of cats with silly "cat" captions. For only FIVE DOLLARS. I found a map in there that was like 300USD or something. I might be confused though. I often am. 

Cephalic problems are most unpleasant. 

I tried to be as festive as possible with themed makeup, though I totally fucked up one eye and did NOT have time to fix it as well as I wanted to, so I was all self-conscious about it all day. I doubt anyone really noticed though. That is what I tell myself. 

I suppose that is all I have to say for today. Oh, my cousin is having a baby today, or she might have already. I don't know. No one is keeping me updated. :o/

Birthdays and Being Realistic

Today is my lovey's birthday, and I am super excited because I feel like I have finally had the chance to give him a really cool birthday present. I feel like I always give him really lame gifts. :o/ I hope this one is spectacular and that he loves it and all that cool stuff. 

I have been playing around with my nail polishes, and I decided that for this week my nails will be coated with OPI's Clubbin' Til Sunrise and China Glaze's Orange Marmalade. They make a really nice combination. It's very pretty and orange and glittery and nice. I also think that it will go really well with Love Dove's and my birthday activity tomorrow! :oD There was a more appropriate color I thought about using, but I was really in the mood to play, so I'm playing. Of course, in the process I managed to get nail polish on my new quilt! I hate myself. 

I am really, really anxious about tomorrow because I am horrified that something will go horribly awry, and I just want everything to be happy and fun and perfect. I have knots in my tummy! No party here! and I can't sleep, though I need to sleep really well in order to really give Love Dove a spectacular birthday. I haven't been this anxious in almost a year. I am so unaccustomed to feeling this way all of a sudden. It used to be routine. I like that it's not, but I really don't like it! Ugh. 

I am trying to form a realistic wish list with items that I can actually afford to buy for myself on a regular basis. I make these kinds of lists to remember things I want to try and remember things I really like and want to continue purchasing/using. Believe it or not, I can forget anything. 

This list includes a few unique makeup brushes (which generally don't need to be repurchased), one mascara, two or three eyeshadows, a couple of eyeshadow palettes (that won't need to be repurchased for a really long time), and more MSFs from MAC. 

My NYX Doll Eye mascara should be on its way to my house, assuming the person with whom I arranged the swap isn't a nasty swaplifter. It's OK if she is, but I'd like to get something out of it. I checked her swap tokens and all that stuff, and she had positive reviews, so I assume she's good for it. I cannot wait to try it. The problem is that I have already found my Holy Grail mascara, so why do I need to try more? Probably because my Holy Grail mascara is amazing and expensive as shit. But it's good, very good. I love it. 

Now I think I can manage sleep or something close.