Sick--still? oh, yes.

As I've been purchasing more makeup items, I've been clearing lots out through MUA. I have already sent out two nail polishes of which I'm not particularly fond. I have lots of other items up for swap as well. That's all.

Last week I developed an icky cold, but over the weekend it seemed to have retreated. False. Monday morning, in the middle of English, I became violently ill. I waited through class, and when I was finished I scurried to the caf to get a brownie. Perhaps a brownie would help. No. The brownies at my school happen to be delicious, but the brownie did nothing for me except provide a few extra calories to burn. I drove home. I really wanted to go to my history class to see my grade on my test, but I felt very close to collapse. I took cold medicine and collapsed. I can't take a lot of any type of medicine to alleviate my sore throat, stuffy nose, aches, etc., so I'm particularly miserable. It still hasn't gone away, so I'll be missing classes again this morning. I hate it. I fucking hate missing classes. It's too early in the semester to have missed as many as I already have. :o/

So over the past two days I've been laying in my bed absolutely miserable, reading books and attempting noms when made available. I re-read New Moon, since the movie is soon, and I didn't give it a review before. I also read some of my philosophy stuff. Descartes. I even did the homework assignment we had, though I won't be able to turn it in since I'm sick. I'll have to e-mail my HOT teacher to get the homework for today. I better be well by Friday, since I absolutely must be in class. ugh.

I am going back to bed.

Sleepy.

Still waiting for my birthday present. Hmph!

A friend ordered a movie for me. I'm awaiting its arrival (on Thursday? methinks).

I've been getting really sick in the mornings for the past few days, and that's no bueno, obviously. I have a test tomorrow, and I absolutely have to be at school at 8:30 A.M. to go to my philosophy class that I have missed like four times. I can't do that if I'm feeling woozy! I can't take a two question essay test if I'm feeling woozy, either. The last time I did that, I FAILED. Woozy be gone!

I am really excited for September because Bones is coming back. That's really all that matters in life. The new season of House looks stupid and just as annoying as all the others, so I'll pass. Even though all episodes of Bones are exactly the same way, I just can't stop watching it. BUT the best thing of all: SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE! I really shouldn't watch that show because I pick a favorite, get attached, and become really sad when that person inevitably leaves. Except not last season--Jeanine won! and she was in my top three. Oh well.

Also, it puts me one month closer to seeing New Moon. Hello.

I'm supposed to mail stuff today, and I need to do that now, but I can't because I'm feeling rather ill. The woozy. Very bad, very bad.

The natural food store next to my house is amazing.

I cannot choose a nail color for this week! :o/

Well, since my medicine is going to kill me.

I was out, and I came home, and my lungs hurt, and my throat hurts, and I feel really, really awful. I have used my inhaler like ten times, and well, that's not good. I guess I will call my doctor on Monday and get some stupid fucking "diagnosis" from my doctor. I am sure it will just be spring allergies aggravating my asthma. The usual. 

I really like the Voile slimshine from MAC. Thanks, love dove! It looks really good on my lips. 

I do NOT understand how people make videos for YouTube where they just talk. I am possibly entering a contest, and I could either do a live video or a photo montage, and I tried to do a video, but I felt really stupid talking to my computer, so I stopped. I can't do it. Photo montage it will be! I made my brother take pictures of my makeup for me since I apparently have Parkinson's. It actually came out really well, considering that I put like 10 minutes into it. It looked exactly as I meant it to look, which is rarely the case with me and my makeup. Unfortunately, it wasn't necessarily pretty because I meant for it to be slightly garish, and that's how it looked. Yay me! And I got waterproof lash glue in my eye. That was awful. 

I have set up another swap on MUA, but I forgot that I can't mail out my stuff until later this week. The person with whom I have arranged the swap is in Canada (boo higher shipping cost), and I am sending a liquid (which BLOWS) and some extra stuff, but she's so nice. She's like "so what else would you like me to send you?" as it is customary on MUA to send extras when swapping. Any extra makeup I have, I've either used (but not often) or give away or thrown away or something stupid, so I'm like "what extras can I send?!" I found some random lip gloss samples that I have (unused, obviously), and a moisturizer sample, and stuff along with the actual swap item. The shipping cost should be lower than the the total price of all the stuff I am sending. Since she lives in Canada, I know she cannot easily obtain the items I am sending, which pleases me. I cannot decide if I should send a lotion sample as well, in the same scent of the spray I am sending. Bath products are the only things I have that I don't use. So...

So about this illness type thing, I am a bit concerned. (Yoda ftw) I was visiting my cousin and her mini earlier, so I'm hoping that I am not incubating an infectious disease as I'd feel like an asshole if I made a baby sick. The small one got the hiccups while I was holding her. I forgot how nervous babies make me. Newborns scare the shit out of me because they feel so fragile, of course. She is awfully cute though. At least she's not one of those funny looking babies. Because it's all about outward appearances, obviously. 

I am trying to finish THE BOOK this week. It will not happen. I am a failure. 

I have no idea what to do with my time right now. I am tired, but I cannot sleep. 

My skin feels really dry, and I feel like just rubbing my shea butter stick all over my face, but since I use it as a lip balm, I'm sure that would be really gross. 

My brother counted my shoes today. He missed quite a few pairs though. I suppose the count is about forty or so. NOT ENOUGH. And he keeps trying to steal my Minolta. 

I should do laundry. 

Finals.

It's finals time! I hate finals. I am not excited about my English final at all because my teacher gave us this really vague question. I hate vague questions! 

And for the oral report, the two groups that went before my partner and me went over time, so we only had like ten minutes to talk, and it sucked because I had to cut stuff out and rush through, and we were just like ...ugh. She particularly put a lot of work into it, so---that was just not cool. Which reminds me---I MUST type our annotated bibliography and send it to our teacher in the morning. If I forget, I will cry. So yes. I will do it. I suppose I could do it right now, after I finish typing this. I will. Then I have to start studying for my history final. I have to get an A. I cannot get anything less than an A. I have some studying to do for my psychology final, and I suppose I should start thinking about my English final, but it's not due until next Thursday. 

My joints are hurting a lot. My muscles are hurting a lot. My face feels bruised. I'm getting concerned about it. I usually just assume that I'm being a hypochondriac and paranoid, but I'm starting to think I might actually have some kind of sickness. But it could also be a result of my new medicine. I figure since most of the muscle problems have been happening for a long time (before I started the medicine), I should have it checked out. I hope they tell me I'm just crazy. I don't like weird symptoms that I can't even think of an explanation for them. (and that sentence) I mean--the joints are arthritic, but it's getting particularly bad. Hmph. 

I was really stressed and frazzled today for some reason. I've stopped taking my Xanax whenever I get really upset. Today I couldn't take any because I didn't get any sleep. I didn't want to fall asleep before my oral report, even though I ended up not really needing to be awake at all. I did, however, make my delicious cinnamon chocolate coffee this morning, and I had two cups of it, and it was delicious, except then I had to pee ALL day. School's over, so I should feel a bit more calm, and I have my summer projects! I was going to apply for something over the summer, but I decided not to. It's OK. I need to rest. It's ridiculous.

I'm considering sending out applications to other schools just to see if I get accepted, and perhaps if I get accepted to the one I like, I'll take out bunches of loans and run away to an island and play in the sand and jump off cliffs and stuff. Or not. 

Oh, maybe I'll find a job. I should look into that before high school is out. Stupid high school students making more money than I do. 

I have two books from the library to read, and I'm excited about them. One is super nerdy and what one would expect me to read. Darwin. And the other is a collection of short stories by Neil Gaiman. Since Amanda Palmer keeps talking about Neil Gaiman, I just have to see why. So I grabbed the book. I find my best readings come from the random books I grab in libraries and book stores. So I have lots of books to read over the summer. Yay! And I hope this summer won't go the same direction that last summer did.

And my birthday had better be super awesome. 

And so had my anniversary with love dove. 

And so had my summer projects. 

And everything else in my life. 

I should probably go back to sleep now. Oh, after the annotated bibliography. Yes. 

Regina Spektor, how I love thee!

So I love Regina Spektor TOO MUCH. She's too cute. And her music rocks, obviously.
Piano! I love it.

So, my internet has been quite finicky. Fucking finicky internets! Not good. So I go to school and run to the public computers with this feeling of absolute ecstasy because I can gaze upon the beauty of THE WORLD WIDE WEB once more! And also check MySpace. It's important.

Musics! Muzak. OMG why does Firefox not underline MUZAK as being spelled incorrectly? WTF?

I just watched the Britney video. Awww! Depression.

My toe hurts.

I need that Juicy Couture!
Haute couture? (high fashion, yo yo yo)

I like the word "couture."
And "dubious."
You and your dubious tastes. Bitch.

So I think I finally want to go to New Zealand. I can't go when I want to go, sadly, but I'll make sure to plan on it. Pencil it in, you know.

I wrote an essay in 15-20 minutes, and I got a B-. Why? I don't proofread! I had time to make sure it was perfect, too. I do this so much. I miss little details, and those little details keep me from my A's.
I wish I had the patience to check my things, especially my math. I have been missing negative signs lately. I don't know why. I've never done that one before.

I feel much less sick than I have been the past couple of days.
OH MY JOY!

I am currently reading three books. The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov, Notes from Underground by my most beloved Dostoevsky, and White Oleander by Janet Fitch.
The Master and Margarita, so far, is pretty SUH WEET, but I am not sure I trust the particular translation I have. I compared it to two others, but something about it irks me. Because I plan to really buckle down and speak as-close-to-perfect-as-I-can-possibly-get Russian (and read), I'll just read it in Russian. In fact, I'll learn Russian just to read it in Russian. Because I like Russian anyway. And those Russians. I love their works, so why shouldn't I read them in their original versions? Exactly.
Notes from Underground is rocking like mad. I love it. I love most of Dostoevsky's work anyway though. I am biased! Anyway, it is good. That is the point I am trying to make. Love.
White Oleander is pretty iffy for me. I like it, and I dislike it. It goes in a lot of different directions. There are too many things happening in such an order. It just yo-yo's between good and bad over and over again. Too obvious if you ask me. It is much too girl like for me; I think. I am not positive. I just know that I don't typically like extremely feminine subjects. I don't think the book is intended to be quite as female as it is. It is too obvious that a woman wrote it is what I mean, and that bothers me. I dislike women who constantly play into feminine stereotypes, and that's exactly what Janet Fitch has done. She has even made the characters in this book fit them all too well. It's obvious that a few aren't really supposed to be interpreted that way, but there is no other way to see them. I probably shouldn't put any of this into a blog. Now every asshole who reads it is going to think I hate women, put women down, etc. Perhaps that rant is for the other blog! (The rant about how completely stupid people are. Oy oy oy!)

I think I should start reading books in French. My French is dying, and I hate to feel it. I hate to see or hear something in French, know it is French but only be able to understand a small part of it. Bothersome! I should start writing in French again as well. Perhaps that would help. We'll see.


P.S. I really love random tags.