Yesterday I attended a protest march in support of the Palestinian people, and all in all it went well. I found a few of the signs people were holding to be a bit offensive (and exaggerative, harmful to the cause) to me as a Jew, but other than that, all was well. I have a bruise on my shoulder from carrying a five pound bag on it. My shoulders also hurt from holding up a sign for roughly two hours. I stopped after a while because it got too painful to bear, even for the cause. I missed my cousin's baby shower to go to this march. yay. Good thing we're not close. I do kind of feel bad though.
I start classes tomorrow, and I am not pleased. I want so badly to have a positive attitude toward this, to start a semester off feeling good, but I am so fucking angry. I went through so much stress trying to get all this stuff done. I want a break. I want a really long break, like, say, a semester long break. Too bad I need drugs to survive and insurance to get the drugs and full time status to get the insurance. And it's pretty much impossible to find a job right now, so fuck my life.
I am finding it difficult to care. I feel so depressed. So bad. I needed to see my therapist. I couldn't. I didn't get to. I don't want to talk about it, but I am FUCKING upset about it. I don't even know what to do with my feelings at this point. The nurses at my psychiatrist's office are bitches, so I cannot call them to discuss this. Fuck it. Maybe I shall try, try again and succeed.
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